A look back in 2010

Is it really already December 31, 2010? I wrote my 2010 goals and re-read them recently.. I must say, I accomplished 95% of those goals!

Last year, I said I would read 6 books .. I think I read 4. Hey, not bad for someone who hates to read!
I wanted us to be debt free:
I awanted to save $10,000.00. We were blessed with some money from Todd's disability with his former employer as well as the VA.
We paid off our credit cards, Thank you LORD!
Our 3 vehicles + stuff-hauler, aka trailer, are also paid off. The only thing we have left is our home here in NC and in FL.
We also purchased close to 6acres in Lillian, AL for our future home!
The Lord was good to us this year financially.

Todd's work-life has been confusing since we met in 2005 but slowly and surely, it's become more safe and less confusing. He was recently State Department certified to teach driving and firearms, which makes him finding contract jobs very easy. Thankfully, he won't be in harms-way anymore. He'll be teaching others instead of protecting.. My heart is at ease knowing he finally knows what he wants to be when he grows up :)

Let's see, what happened this year...

• January - I was 3 months pregnant and was working 3 people's jobs at work. It was very stressful and I thought I was going to die from anxiety. My work hours were reduced to 32 hours a week and life was just a tad better.
  
• February - Wow, life was a blur.. I can't remember much in this month. My g/f lost her sweet baby and I think I cried for about an hour after reading her blog. I don't know how she does it, but she is a strong woman. I've lost a father, but never a child.. Hey, guess what? You will see those lost babies in heaven! God has them in the palm of His hand!
• We also found out this month we were having a boy. We named him instantly! Owen Neil Schrader. He's such a handsome young man :)
  
• March - Todd and I celebrated our 3-year anniversary of marriage. As I look back, I can say 2010 was a great marital year for us. Year 1-2 were hard but year 3 was great. Here's to a better year 4!
  
• April - I didn't post hardly anything on my blog so I must've been really tired. I was heading into my 3rd trimester and I was very sleepy then. Ha! I had a lovely baby shower at my moms home!
  
• May - We were praying our home would sell. We had a lot of people look at it, but alas, no one bought it. Better luck this time!
  
• June - We are gearing up for the baby to be born. Just one more month left. I had a great baby shower at work and I am prepared for his arrival. Work-wise, we got a new boss who is amazing. He is the best thing that has happened to that company in a long time. I truly hope he prospers there and can change some things there. He's very smart.
  
• July - Owen is born!! But like Ayden, we weren't able to bring him home. What's worse than leaving your baby in the NICU? I don't know.. it's horrible. I had a bad epidural affect and had a reverse epidural to stop my spinal fluid from leaking. I am glad God made me a strong woman.. this was the worst pain I had ever been in. I then went hysterical with laughing/crying.. It hurt. Badly. Man, was I ready to get home. Then, the nurse comes in with Owen in an incubator and took him to a different hospital. Wow, our hearts sank and we cried together for a long time.. We were ready to get home and sleep. Our man came home 6 days after he was born and is fine and healthy!
  
• August - Ayden turns 7! My husband was gone training and flew my sister up for a surprise. I thought it was my mom and was in utter shock when I saw my sister walk up to my truck. I love her endlessly.. She is the best sister EVER!!!!!!
  
• September - my birthday .. and I was given the opportunity to work from home. I didn't want to work and put the baby in daycare so my boss helped me out and let me work from home for almost 3 months. It was HARD!
  
• October - Still busy. Hating working from home. I was still a salaried exempt employee but my life was 'hard'. I had time for Owen and my job. I didn't have time for Ayden or Todd or me. I knew my time with Blackwater would soon end.
  
• November - a few weeks before Thanksgiving, I gave my resignation. I could've stayed on for a bonus in December but honestly, it was way too hard and I gave myself a bonus.. being a stay at home mommy. Now I clean, do laundry, do the dishes and take care of the kids.. BEST job I've ever had! :)
  
• December - Well, this month is finally at a close. We went to MI for Christmas and Todd was sick on Christmas Day. He's upset he missed Owen's first Christmas.. He was 'fine' in the morning and got to see Ayden open his presents at least! I told him "Don't worry, there will be more Christmas-es"

I'm happy this year is coming to an end. I love a new year .. it is the beginning of a new chapter in my life and I'm praying God continues to bless my family the way he blessed us last year. He has always found favor in me.. I always run into money and it's not by chance either! God blesses us for some reason.. I hope 2011 goes well. I hope our country turns around and thrives. I do think prophecy is being fulfilled though and am grateful I know where my family is going when "that time" comes.

So, for 2011 - I wish you peace, joy, happiness, love, wealth. Be blessed beyond all measures.. hey, when you're blessed, why don't you turn around and bless someone else :)

View from my backyard

God is Amazing

Christmas card 2010

Just wanted to post a cute Christmas card of my sweet boys. I took the picture and my future-bro-in-law edited it for me. Ha! I am so dumb when it comes to photoshop or whatever you fancy people use :D

So, I am only sending this to my family. I was lazy.. no.. I was busy with a 5 month old and didn't make time to get addresses. So, here's your virtual Christmas card!

Don't forget to check out my food blog http://www.twokennedysdesign.blogspot.com

God is amazing!

Man,

This picture just isn't as pretty on here. I took it this morning from my backyard. God is simply amazing!

Here's to an early New Years Resolution

Well, it's been 15 months since I was able to work out and I started again this past week. My neighbor sent me her copy of 30-Day Shred and I've done it 3 times already. Level one has kicked my butt, but in a good way. I love the feeling of working out and getting healthy again. It's been too long since I looked and felt good. I'm glad she sent it to me! I bought a used copy from amazon.com with my swagbucks FOR FREE!!! and it should be here this week so I can return the neighbors copy.
The only goal I am setting for myself this year is to be healthy. I have tons of allergy problems and get sinus infections that kick my tail. I don't know how I'm going to do it without my allergy shots, but I am going to find something that makes me well if I get sick. Working out will help fight infection and it will make me feel pretty again. I haven't felt pretty in so long!
What are your goals? :)

It's been a while blogger, I missed you!

It's been a while. I think I missed talking to you. I'm glad to be back and finally have some time to post. I've been reading some other blogs lately and am really sad and depressed after seeing them. It puts my spirit in such a bad mood and then my heart just drops and I am upset so hopefully I haven't done that to anyone.

Let's see here, Owen is now 5 months old. He wears 9-12 month clothes and is roughly 21-22 pounds. I have a great eater on my hands but man is this kid heavy! He is such a joy to have around and almost always has a smile on his face. It's nice to see that sweetness in this small body. I am blessed to have two great kids!!!

Ayden is 7 and doing well in 2nd grade. We just had a change in our family name.. well, he did :) His name is now Ayden McCoy-Kennedy Schrader!! YAY! It's official! He was adopted by my husband and the paperwork finally went through on November 30, 2010. Bless his heart, he is still clueless about the name change. I was talking to him tonight about it and told him me and daddy have known each other for 6 years and that he is 7. It did not enter his mind at all. Apparently, this is for a reason since it was the 2nd time I tried to talk to him about it. All is well in this house and I will not ruin anything if I'm able to.

Todd and I are doing great! It's always good to hear that, isn't it? We're going on 4 years of marriage - a few more months and it'll be our anniversary. Time sure does fly. I'm amazed at how much closer we get every day. I love that man endlessly <3

As for me.. well I'm part of the Stay-at-home-mom's club now. I really enjoy spending my time with Owen and seeing Ayden get off the bus and not go to a crappy daycare. He loves spending time with me. I hope that never changes. I have a lot of baby time and don't have a lot of 'me' time, but I'm okay with that. When he takes his 2-hour naps, I enjoy watching tv or just sitting.. or taking a nap as well!

My long-term goal, to be a mentor to young women. I don't know when or how, but I know I've saved one baby's life already and to me, my life is a success!!! Anywho, I hope you are well.. <3

How my Saving Grace came to be...

...It wasn't because I was in love. It was because I even remotely liked this person who hit me.. It was sexual abuse. I was taken advantage of and that night, my body decided it was time for me to have a little baby grow inside my belly. It scared me when I found out. I cried. I was 19 years old.. single.. pregnant.. ALONE. Yep, the one who said "It would never happen to me!" So, it happened and that's how my little one came to be.

I got the courage, finally, and kicked him out of my apartment. He was no longer welcome in my life. EVER! He finally left and I had a lot to clean up. My apartment; my life. If it wasn't for this one wrong thing that happened, I don't think I would be alive today - which is why I call Ayden my saving grace.

You see, if it wasn't for me getting pregnant, I truly believe I would have died at the hands of an angry young man. I locked myself in the bathroom when I took my pregnancy test and he came at me with a knife then he said he was leaving (PRAISE GOD! ... but then he ended up staying a little bit longer). He beat me, he choked me, he came at me constantly with kitchen knives. I almost passed out the day he choked me and boy that was it! I couldn't believe that someone would choke a pregnant woman.. well, someone who is normal wouldn't do that.

He left. I moved out and back in with my folks. I suffered.. but I became whole again. I paid my mom back for what I owed her. She nursed me back to health. I slept, constantly. Anyone who's been pregnant knows you sleep a lot but this was a healing sleep. This was survival. If I didn't sleep.. well, I'm just glad my family was there to help me.

Ayden was born at 39 weeks. He was healthy. Beautiful. And all mine! I never had to share him and in fact, I have 100% custody because 'he' signed over his rights. Almost 6 years together with Todd and our adoption will be final in a few weeks. He's a great husband and father and I'm happy to announce Ayden will be a little Schrader one of these days soon :)

If it wasn't for Ayden ... if it wasn't for all those STUPID mistakes ... I wouldn't be here. Ayden wouldn't be here. I wouldn't have married a great man and Owen wouldn't be here.

My Saving Grace ... I love you!

My new blog!

I've started blogging on helpful tips and recipes. I love to do things quick and easy. I have just been offered to work from home so I have to make home-life easier on myself and the rest of the Schraders!
To follow my other blog, click this link http://www.twokennedysdesign.blogspot.com

Baby boy is now 9 weeks old!

I cannot believe how fast time flies when you're having fun. Man, this kid is amazing! He is the sweetest little thing. He is just like his brother - CUTE! Ayden is in love with his "little bro" and can't get enough of hi. I see a great future between the two :)

Owen has had a round of shots and calmed down pretty quickly. That night was a terrible pain though - his leg was hot and swollen and he was up most of the night. Tylenol was heavily administered.

Thankfully, seeing him go through all the shots in the NICU, I knew this was NOTHING compared to that! Which, I am very thankful he is home from that horrible place. Nothing worse than seeing your child in pain; not able to take him home with you.

He is in 6-9 month clothes and weighs about 14 pounds now. This kid is growing like a weed. He eats between 6-8 ounces .. not normal .. but hey, he's hungry and I am happy to feed him!

Here is a picture of him sleeping on his mamma. He loves watching me and playing with me. He sticks his tongue out when I do and loves talking! He says "O" a lot and smiles non-stop. He makes friends with every light he sees. He's not shy about that :)

Have a great week!

How blessed are you?

I stumbled upon a post from someone I don't know. This is the second time I've come upon her blog and I am happy that I found it, but really sad at the same time.
She lost her baby boy ...
I know a lot of women who have had miscarriages and it just breaks my heart. I fell apart when my friend miscarried while I was pregnant. She was only 2 or 3 weeks behind me .. I bawled. Todd didn't know what I was crying about until I stopped crying. I don't think she ever knew how much I ached for her, but I did and still today I pray for her healing.
I am thankful the Lord has blessed me with my children. He found favor in me and Todd and blessed us beyond all measures! I am thankful. I am blessed. I am so happy to have two healthy children that I call my own.
When my father passed away, I had tons of teachers come to my home to pray with us. I remember my teacher, Mr. Ashworth came by. I stared at the floor when he was speaking to me but I never have forgotten the words he said. He said "God will never give you more than you can handle". AMEN TO THAT! If it wasn't for those words, I think my whole world would have fallen apart. I kept repeting that to myself and by God's grace, I LIVED!
So, I am blessed. God has found favor with me and my family! I am blessed!

Part 3

Did you know that I have low self-esteem? I am married to a wonderful person who treats me like a queen and thinks I am beautiful.

Without make-up, "he" called me ugly. With make-up, "he" called me a slut. It was like I couldn't win with him. It's was so weird trying to figure out WHAT he wanted from me. I can't tell you how horrible and ugly I felt when we were together. I didn't start thinking I was pretty until I met Todd (2.5 years later).

I hate being called negative names. I was always picked on in school - every grade level. I'm not sure if it was because I really was ugly??? or if it was because people were jealous?? or if it was because the boys secretly liked me?? I was never the popular one and always wanted to be. Looking back, I am glad I wasn't popular. I think I learned that being fake was stupid and I don't think I ever was a fake person. I strived to be pretty and the best I could be. I might have fallen short in some areas, but overall I was happy with myself.

These days, I know that I am not ugly. My husband thinks I'm beautiful. Ayden thinks I'm pretty and reminds me daily that "I'm the best mom in the world". Life without him would be dull and boring. Even though my mistake of being with "him" happened, God gave me the best gift in the world. I could not have asked for a better little boy. GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE AND I AM HERE TO PROVE IT!

God blessed me. He blesses me daily. He blesses my family. We are favored in His sight!


"All things work together for good, to them that are called according to His purpose"

What are you thankful for today?

Surprise!

Ayden's 7th birthday is tomorrow - mine is Sept. 4th. We had a shared present arrive today.. it was my SISTER! My wonderful husband flew her in to hang out with us for a week and I am so excited to have her here.

She's always been such an encouragement to me and I look up to her. I don't think I've ever told her that, so sis, when you read this, I love you :)

Part 2 .. the sage continues

Who thinks they'd be in an abusive relationship?

*Verbal
*Physical
*Mental
*Sexual

Not me. I never thought I'd be that person. The person you feel bad for. The person you want to just grab and run with and take to the police. Yep. That was me for about 3 months. Three months! That's it! It could have been longer but the grace of God brought me out of that hell-on-earth relationship. Man, I've said it before, I say it a lot, but GOD IS GOOD!

I've been choked. Beaten. Almost stabbed. Punched.

I remember going to my favorite hair lady in Florida. She was the best and I went to her forever, or so it seemed. One day, "he" and I walk in to get my hair done. She put my cape on and began coloring my hair. She's ever so lightly brush my shoulder with her body trying to move around and work and I'd almost cry from the pain. I have only told this story a few times because I guess to some people it seems unbelieveable... I was punched so hard so many times that it hurt when she touched my arms. I was covered, no one could see my bruises. If you could see them, you'd know I was "that girl".

She saw him as he walked in and had a funny feeling. He left for a bit to go look around at other stores near the salon.. She asked me about him but I was so scared to say anything so I kept mostly quiet.

About 2-3 weeks later, she told me she knew him! A past client of hers knew 'him' and he came to the salon with her. He was stalking her and wouldn't leave her alone. She was blessed. He did not hurt her. Anyways, it's funny how God puts you in places and others have the opportunity to help. BUT! They cannot help if you don't let them.

That day will always stick out in my mind.

Don't ever let anyone hurt you in ANY of the above mentioned areas. Hopefully, the only pain you'll ever have to endure is verbal pain. That alone will put you through hell ... but only if you ALLOW it.

I'll touch more on another post about the verbal abuse as well as other abuses I went through.

...My saving grace came to be because of this situation and I would not change it for the world!

My Saving Grace and how he came to be. My story, Part 1.

My friend changed some things around on her blog and it inspired me to do the same! I think in the next few posts, I will talk about my saving grace - Ayden.

I've always said "Without him, I'd be dead" and I feel like I'm ready to talk about it.

Keep an open mind with me here as I am a horrible writer and I ramble a lot. I wish I was like my sister, she can write and bring things to life. It's truly amazing to see her posts and I envy that. I truly have a desire to write well..

Almost 8 years now have passed since I met "him". I will refer to him as "him" because I hate mentioning his name. He was suave. He was handsome. He told me things I wanted to hear and I bought every little piece of a lie he told me. I spent so much time on his lies believing every word he had to say. He was a professional con-artist. He was good at it, too. I met "him" online. There, I said it.. Now you know, the word is out. I met someone off the internet! He had been watching me for a while and knew all the right things to say to make me comfortable meeting him. He was good at what he did. He fooled me.

The first time we met, I had this horrible feeling in my gut. Something (or someone, ie the Holy Spirit) was telling me to just leave the train station. "Don't let him in your truck. Put it in reverse and leave Angela! LEAVE! " I didn't listen. I stayed. I waited. It was a dark, rainy day - that I do remember. I got out of my truck and gave "him" a hug like we had known each other for years. The devil must've been around because it felt 'okay' at that time.

Looking back at that moment, I realize I could have been killed or raped (well, I was raped but I'll get to that in another post) or raped and left to die. How stupid and naive was I. A 19 year old GIRL went to meet a stranger and let "him" stay in her apartment. S-T-U-P-I-D!

Things went well in the beginning two weeks. We went out at night all the time and had a blast. It was so much fun hanging out with him. He didn't care who I talked to and wasn't jealous - that was all a part of "his" game. He wrapped me in to his game and I fell for it. I really liked hm. He was so nice and charming and said all the right things, for those first two weeks at least.

The third week of our relationship, he started punching me. I didn't take crap like that so I'd punch him back and that would be it. It was like that for a week or so and then things began to get violent - very violent. He would choke me and lock me inside. If I went anywhere near the living room where the only exit was, he'd drag me back into the bedroom. I was in fear for my life.

"Why didn't you tell your mom or sister or someone about this?" you ask.. I was afraid. Any abused woman will tell you they are afraid to say something or to tell someone. I was afraid he would kill me. After all, on multiple occassions, he said he would and I believed everything else he said so why wouldn't this be real too?

...

I'll write more later.. This is a place for me to share my life with you. It is not a place for you to pity me or feel sorry for me. I will tell my story and you will see how Ayden came to be in this world. You will see why I call him my Saving Grace. You will know why I am the way I am.

Friday, the 13th. Dum Dum Dum

My life as a parent to a new baby has been so much fun but pretty challenging. The first month of Owen's life was great! He was such a good boy and hardy cried .. he was held most of the time so I wonder why he wasn't crying. You see, we went to Florida for a week to visit my family in Pensacola and then we went to Michigan to see Todd's family for a week. Either I or my mom/sister held Owen the whole time in Florida and then I was pretty much left alone to fend for myself and the boys in MI so he was constantly held there.

We got home a week ago and boy was he fussy! I couldn't figure out what was wrong with him but I just prayed over him and held him and loved on him. It's hard to keep your calm 100% of the time with someone who can't tell you what's wrong with them so thankfully my husband and sweet Ayden have been around to help and make me laugh. I figured it had something to do with him not receiving anymore breastmilk (I was in so much pain that I quit nursing/pumping). I also figured it was just gas.. then I started to let the devil in and thought it might've been colic. I was so upset that I couldn't calm him down so I called his doctor - we went in to an appointment that morning and she had us switch his formula and it looks liks that was the problem. Looks like the formula was bothering his tummy since he was getting mostly breastmilk and just a few ounces of formula at every feeding.

He's been so much more peaceful and happy .. it's a relief!

Ayden starts school on the 25th - 2nd grade! I can't believe he turns 7 on the 22nd. My life is flying by. I have decided that I will be turning in my 2 weeks notice once I get back to work at the end of September. I don't want to miss time with the boys. Thankfully, I am able to be a stay at home mom if I wanted to.

Once we sell our home here, we will be building a home in Lillian, AL. We bought almost 6 acres of land and can't wait to start building our new home! I cannot wait to get back down south. So many reasons to move there...
-My family is there
-The beach
-The "warm" winters
-I know the area
-Stores are closer than 45 minutes away
-My friends are there
-More churches to choose from
-My doctors are there (I'm picky)

I'm really hoping we can get down there this year sometime.. Praying we will.

<3 to you!

15 days old, my sweet angel

So my sweet baby boy is 15 days old today. Yay, happy half-month birthday baby! :)
I never thought I'd be a mommy again. I just didn't think that would happen with the way mine and Todd's busy lives were going. A year ago, we decided we wanted a baby so I got off of birth control. It broke me out in the worst acne I have EVER had in my life. That alone made me want to get on the pill immediately. How vain!

We tried from July-September and I didn't think we'd get pregnant but we did. I didn't realize it until one weekend, when I was alone at home with Ayden. I did not want to get off the couch that weekend. I was so sick. I thought I had a hang over to be honest with you. I only had a few glasses of wine the night before but I had never felt like that. So, I went on my day and just dealt with the blah feeling and took a good nap. The next day, we went to the dollar store to get my newspapers for the coupons and they had a pregnancy test at the register so I decided I'd pick one up. I've always heard the first morning pee was when you'd get the best reading but I decided to shower and then take the test that night. To my utter surprise and shock, I was in shock, I find out we are pregnant.

I had just gotten off the phone with him before I went to shower and I already told him goodnight. He was getting up early so I didn't think he'd answer the phone again and I didn't want to call the house phone - I wanted to talk to him only. So I called him again to let him know the good news and we both started crying. That man is so sensitive, I just love it! I talked to his parents for a quick minute and had to call everyone else that is truly my family.. I called my mom first, then my sister and then my best friend, Katie.

Without those people in my life, I don't know where I'd be. They all influence me and keep me a good woman. I will be honest and tell you that Todd and I were complacent with each other.. kind of bored with each other. No, we weren't looking for love elsewhere - just not best friends like we usually are. So, when we find out, it brought us closer together. My girlfriend at work would ask how Todd and I are doing and I would just brag at what a good daddy he's being to my little bean growing inside. I always said how wonderful he was to me and that things in our marriage were awesome..

.. I didn't think it would be better than that, but it really is. He's so good to me and to Owen and Ayden. He gets up at night with me and tries to help any way he's able to. Our marriage is thriving! You know what the old married people say.. "I love you more today than I did when we were married." Totally true. This man makes me fall in love with him all over again.

Our family is blessed. I am a blessed woman with blessed children and a blessed husband. It looks as if I will be a stay at home mommy, thanks to God for supplying us with what we need. It never fails how amazing he is to us.

We are in the process of selling our home and trying to get back down to Florida.. I can't wait to get back and get our butts into a good church.. just have to find a good one. There is a good one off Blue Angel, but it irritates Todd when the people yell out stuff when the guy is preaching. Then there's a sister church off 9-mile road. I love the music but the preaching isn't as good as the other one. We will probably try Hillcrest or somewhere else when we get settled back. We need it.

Anyway - life is good. God is good to us. We are a happy 4-some and I am truly happy.

Be blessed!

36.5 weeks

Today I went in to the doctor and got my first check since I had a pap last September. I am happy to report that I am 1cm dilated and 50% effaced. My doc doesn't think I'll have the baby early, but since I'm already half-way effaced, I'm a tad concerned. Not concerned in a bad way, just worried my folks and Todd's folks won't be here in time in case he comes early. They are both 13+ hours away from us here in North Carolina so it'll be nice if he actually comes on his induction date - which I might add is July 2nd. Just 3 days before my due date.

Everything is going well. The baby's heart rate always sounds so good. It never gets old listening to it! I've only gained 22 pounds, Yes!! That's how much I weighed the day I gave birth to Ayden. I'm very glad this pregnancy has gone on without a hitch. No problems have ever happened. I am very blessed.

Things at work are actually going great. We have a new boss - he's been there about a month-ish now? I love working with him. He's a mentor, which is what we've never had in my department. He is always encouraging and gives compliments when they have been earned.. which also never happened in my department before he came along. He's great. I hope he lasts because it's people like him, with a great attitude and fresh ideas that'll help my department grow. I really wish I didn't have to go back to work after Owen is born, but I'm glad I won't have to go back to a hellacious work place. Very happy about that.

Ayden just finished his last day of 1st grade. It's amazing how fast time flies. Just yesterday I remember finding out I was pregnant and now he'll be 7 in August and in 2nd grade. WOW! He is so sweet and kind-hearted. I couldn't have ever dreamed up a better child than this kid. He has been and always will be mmy saving grace.

<3

Almost, ALMOST done

I'm to the point of exhaustion. I'm tired. I'm grumpy. I'm sore. I hurt all the time. I pee non-stop. I am fully ready to have this baby. If pregnancy wasn't so taxing, I might think about having another one in 3-4 years, but I just don't think I want to go through this again. It's all fun and exciting. It truly is. I've had enough and I'm ready to meet Owen.
I have about 3.5 weeks until I get induced. I'll be home for the 4th of July. I'll have 6 weeks to get to know Owen before I have to go back to work then daddy is taking over full time. I thought I'd be the one to do it, but that's not looking too good for me. Oh well. If it is meant to be, it'll happen. I just have to be patient.
Owen is growing well. I don't have any stretch marks. Ayden can't wait to be a big brother and daddy is nervous but really excited.
35 weeks ... 3.5 and counting. almost done. Thank God!

33 weeks, but only 6 to go

I am getting induced the last week of June (Hopefully Friday the 25th but I can't get everything I wish for.)
I am totally nervous and have been so moody lately. Thankfully it hasn't been since about week 32, but the moodiness really wears me out and it makes home life hard. Todd is awesome and just ignores my moods. I try not to talk to anyone when I'm upset but I know I still have this thing around me screaming "IM PISSED LEAVE ME BE!" I'm blaming it on my hormones. It sucks.
I guess I'm waiting on the house to sell - waiting on someone to look at it and fall in love with it. It's a burden and we're nervous no one will want it, but we keep praying and trucking!
Since I'm moody, I'm keeping it short - I don't feel like typing.
Hope you're doing better than me!!!!!

31 weeks - 9 to go. Really?

I have not posted anything lately. I've been exhausted beyond belief, which I guess is normal. I'm so tired during the week and lucky me, not too tired on the weekend to enjoy it. Today was 90+ out and I laid out for a good 3 hours. I am a little pink but didn't burn. We had a great time outside today. I laid out while Todd pitched to Ayden. My boy can hit a ball! I read a dessert magazine I picked up at Lowe's the other weekend and now I have a craving for all the foods in there. There's one I am excited to make for July 4th. Hopefully I won't be in the hospital then (It's my favorite holiday.)

Back to my pregnancy.. I go back next Thursday during my 32nd week. I believe I will be going back every 2 weeks and then every week when I hit the 36 week mark. My doctor is on board with induction. Lots of walking and activity and I'm hoping I'll dilate properly so that I can be induced. I'd love to have Owen in June so my selfishness can get me home July 4th. If not, it's okay, but I really want to be home then.

Todd's folks and my folks are coming down as soon as we find out the date. It'll be a full house, but once they all leave and Ayden goes to FL with my folks, it's going to be so quiet! Minus the times the baby is crying :) As sad as it sounds, I'm looking forward to the crying. It awesome to be able to comfort your child when he's upset. I can't wait to see my husband with his very own flesh and blood. The boy was jamming and I mean JAMMING the other night in my belly for at least 2 hours (at one point I was over all the movement!). I looked over and Todd had tears in his eyes. That man can be so hard and have such a hard shell, but he can be such a softy when it comes to certain things. It makes me realize how sweet and caring he is. He is already a great daddy to Ayden, but I think this new birth will change him even more. I can't wait to see us transform as a family.

As soon as I get all dolled up - very hard to do with a lump on your front - I will take some pictures and post them. Don't let me forget!

God has blessed us immeasurably!

a little more than 10 weeks until Owen is here

I can't believe how fast this pregnancy has flown. parts of me thinks it is dragging by, but wow - only 10 more weeks, maybe less if induced, until he's here!!?

We spent all afternoon yesterday and then all day today making the outside of our yard beautiful and I must say, it looks wonderful!! We did a great job! As I sat down for a breather and let my feet have a break for a minute, I was very thankful that we were able to fix up the yard before Owen if here. It would have been way too hard to do that with him, so, thanks God for letting him still be in my belly :)

Nothing too new with the baby and my weight really. I go in Tuesday for my stupid (I hate this test) diabetes test. I also have to get a shot in my butt cheek because I have the RH thing.. so Tuesday is a day off for me. Todd and I will have a mini-date that day without little Ayden.

Speaking of Ayden, he is doing wonderful in school. He is so very smart. We couldn't be more proud of him! He is rating above grade level and is coming home with green almost every single day. He's doing such a good job! Monday he has some sort of award at school and all the kids in the elementary school he's going to will see him get it. We're going, such proud parents we are. I'll make sure to take pictures and post what it was he was awarded for.

The house is coming along. Todd almost has the bathroom done - once that's finished, it will be time to go up on the market. We've already had a couple drive by and ask our realtor about it. I hope they liked what they saw the other day. If not, they need to drive by again and see the lovely yard work we've done. I know we'll be back down in Florida, I'm just praying it'll happen before Owen is born. BUT, if not, it's okay too because it's in God's hands.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend and week!

11 weeks, 6 days

I'm in my 28th week and am so ready, already, to have Owen out. Granted, I want a full-term pregnancy.. I am so exhausted and cranky. I am tired of being tired. I am over being cranky. I know I won't get a ton of sleep after he's born, but I do think my energy levels will be more normal once my hormones get themselves back together.

We had a great time in Florida for spring break. Did wayyy too much, but we had a great time. Thankful we had a free place to stay with my mom and step-dad.. I bet they were ready for us to leave but sad to see us go at the same time.

Well, like I said, I am exhausted - I hate to cut this short but I am going to cut it short.. Hope everyone has a great week!

2 more days until Florida

I cannot express how excited I am to go to Florida. I truly love that place. It's funny how I always said stuff like "If I move, I am NEVER coming back." And "Florida sucks people in, it's for retirement." Well, I'm ready to be back and I'm ready to move back. I think NC is pretty, but the people aren't friendly like Floridians and the weather is HORRIBLE here. The beach sucks (it's ice cold in the middle of summer) and I miss living 20 minutes away from a Walmart or Target.

We're leaving Friday and will be there for about 5 days. Saturday is my shower so if anyone reading wants to come, it's at 5pm at my mom's house. You can email me for directions :) I need baby stuff!! ha!

I am very tired. To the point of exhaustion.. I haven't felt like this in years and believe me, when you're this tired, you don't forget the feeling and emotions.. It's stuck with you for the rest of your life. (Mine, at least). I hope to recoop and recover from lack of energy. I'm sure a few hours on the beach next week will have some sort of healing affect!

I hope everyone has a good rest of the week and weekend. Happy Easter!!!

25 weeks, 15 to go!

I had my 6 month appointment today and to my surprise, I gained 5 pounds in the past 4 weeks. No wonder I am so tired and my back hurt so much (the growing hoo-ha's aren't helping either). I am back on schedule to working out again. Although it hurts to walk sometimes and lift my legs past 2" off the ground (it hurts my uterus.. weird, huh?), I am determined to get out at least 5 days a week, hopefully 7 days, and start walking at least 1 mile if not more. I do not want a huge baby, I do not want to get fat, I do not want gestational diabetes, I do not want an unhealthy baby, I do not want this weight to stay with me after Owen is born. I am bound and determined, even in the summer months, to get outside like I said - 5 days a week and walk at least 1 mile. Here's to the rest of my pregnancy and not gaining so much weight.

Here's my problem. First two trimesters (27 weeks starts my third so I'm saying most of my 2nd trimester here) I haven't had a craving for sweets. I have been so hungry the past two weeks and have baked non-stop. I am contributing to my weight gain, which totally sucks. My husband is going to be my accountability partner and help me get outside and walk and to help watch what I eat. I eat snack after snack at night. I crave sweets and lots of them at night. Now I guess I'll have to cut back on baking the brownies and cakes and really focus on the natural sweets I buy at the store - ton of oranges MMMMM, strawberries MMMM, apples MMMM, apricots! I maybe need to buy more yogurt and put more peanut butter in my life. I love dipping apples, bananas and celery in peanut butter. It's going to be really hard to stay away from sweets since it's really close to me (sad). Wish me luck and a little encouragement every now and again.

Well, here's my favorite picture of my boys this weekend at the range. First time daddy and Ayden went to the range and used Ayden's gun. :) It's my fav!

Pictures today - March 19. 6months

2 weeks until Florida!

Two weeks until Florida! I cannot wait! I am so glad Ayden's spring break is in April this year. We're able to come down to FL and get some warm sun that we've missed living here in the cold and dark NC.
So, on the agenda!
Shower -April 3 - 5pm at my moms
Easter - April 4
Monday - going to Foley to the Coach store (yay!)
Tuesday - LOTS OF BEACH and Peg Leg's. GIMME DEM OYSTERS!
Wednesday - LOTS OF BEACH and Mellow Mushroom with the Lowe's
Thursday - Hopefully we'll be there so I can grab lunch with my LLBFF, Jen!
Fri-Sun - back to NC and relaxing before work and school

Can't wait! Can't wait! Can't wait!

6 months has flown by!

Tomorrow, Monday, starts my 24th week. Owen is kicking and playing and moving all the time. I think we're going to use Liam as his middle name, but we'll see. I've been tired the past few days and hoping I don't start going to bed at 7:30 again. That sucked!! But, if I'm tired, I guess I'll have to do what my body is telling me.

Ayden is looking forward to having his brother here. At first he was upset that it was a boy but now he's really happy. He kisses my tummy every morning before I leave for work and always pulls up my shirt to see my belly. He's adorable :)

Two more weeks until we leave for Florida! I can't wait! I hope it's nice and sunny when we're there. Got the shower on the 3rd then Easter on the 4th. I love easter egg hunts! I think that was the best thing we use to do. I loved coloring the eggs and then finding them. Not sure if we'll go to rhuch or just hang out but I know that day will be filled with family.

I hope everyone has a good week! I am praying I have a good week and that my boys do as well. Hoping Todd can get the bathroom done so we can put the house on the market. I'd really like to sell and possibly move before the baby, but it's in God's hands.

My 50th post goes out to coupons and menus

I have decided, along with moneysavingmom.com, to do a menu for two weeks.. Plan it out, write Sunday through Saturday down and put down what you're going to eat. This is easy for me because we focus on dinners since we're all gone during the day and sammy's are our lunch staple. So, I have two weeks worth of 7-day dinners written down and I must say, this week I don't need 1 single ingredient. Week 2, I will use my coupons, pay with cash and buy only what's needed for week 2's menu. I do believe we will see dramatic reductions by doing this and I am so excited!

Todd is always proud of me if I save $1.00 or $50.00 at the grocery store - he's totally on board with me here.. and he's starting to realize that shopping for stuff that we need only combined with a sale is pretty rewarding.

An excellent site to go to as I mentioned earlier is www.moneysavingmom.com. SHE IS AWESOME!

Why don't you hop over to facebook and become a fan of wheat thins. I did and I was able to print two $1.00 off coupons that won't expire until May!

23 weeks already!

Wow, only 17 more to go before the baby is here! I can't believe how easy this is going.. I am so blessed to have a great pregnancy and support system. My husband is awesome and is caring; I really think this is the closest we've been since we first met. Things are going great! Ayden is sweet and loving as always and can't wait to meet his brother. He's going to be a great big brother!

Only thing I've been worried about since last night is I have an on-and-off painful side stitch, which would normally happen to a beginning runner.. Not sure if I should call the doctor yet so I'm going to give it a few more days and if it's still nagging me, I'm going to call in and get an appointment. I cleaned alllll day long yesterday and cooked so I'm thinking that is the cause, but I don't know. It'll be okay I'm sure. Not worried about it since nothing else is bothering me.

So I did a bad thing today. Made a dark chocolate cake with chocolate icing and had a super huge big piece of it but it was SO good! I want some more but it's almost bedtime and I'm trying to eat well so I don't get gestational diabetes. I was borderline with Ayden.. They (meaning online resources) say if a mother has gestational diabetes, she's likely to get a type of diabetes approximately 5 years after the baby is born. I already have hypoglycemia and will do everything in my power to NOT have diabetes. That would just suck.

I'm starting my part time/full time hours this week.. I'm praying everything goes well. I'm afraid the work load will not get easier but I'm only one person and I guess all I can say is that it's not my problem to worry about it - that's what managers are for.. mine so happens to not communicate or care about his workers. It will be a direct reflection of his leadership skills.. or lack thereof.

Anywho, I am about to get something to drink and hop in bed. I hope everyone has a great week! (Good luck to Chase on his FCAT this week!)

A way to a fuller wallet!

Todd and I are back on track with our budget. For starters, I will be working part time hours starting next week (still getting paid my full time hours thankfully). With that being said, I now have the time to grocery shop after work when everyone else won't be in the store. 2 plusses there - 1 is because I have control of the coupons and budget and 2 because I get irritated and honestly cannot concentrate when there's a lot of people around. I shop best when I'm alone and can score 40%-60% savings.
I am going to start slowly with the envelop system. I am going to use cash for eating out and grocery shopping. Best part about the system is I am able to compare my coupons with the prices at the store first and then budget how much I think it will cost. It's a game for me and I love it. It truly gives me joy when I see the savings on the receipt!
Another plus to me working part time is we are now able to have Ayden come home instead of going to daycare, which saves us $280.00 a month right there!
Small, slow, baby steps - taking it one week, one newspaper full of coupons, one grocery store at a time. Sunday is fun for me. I wake up early (7am or so) and go to the gas station and pick up my papers and come home and clip and file away. I have my grocery list made and coupon savings beside the name of the item and save. But beware! Some cashiers don't scan all coupons which makes me very mad, but I normally won't cause a fuss if I notice 1 was missed. Regardless, I will be posting my savings again because I am hoping this works well as it has for us in the past.
Yay for coupons.Yay for saving.Yay =)

I feel like I am at rock bottom

I feel like with all the growth physically within me that I should be happy. It's hard to be happy when my life at work, 50+ hours a week, is horrible. People, I truly am not exaggerating. It is the worst place, the worst feeling I've had about a job since I first started working.
#1, I am pregnant and working over 40 hours a week (mind you, not getting paid for it)
#2, Doing the job of 3 people and not getting paid extra - no lie
I am tired of people always asking me to do stuff for them when can't they get someone else to do it? Or better yet DO IT YOURSELF? I am tired of being upset, miserable, angry about my job. I never take a break. I am constantly stressed and I think I have hit rock bottom. The strangest part to me right now is that I am unable to cry. I usually can cry over anything, but I cannot gather up the energy or tears to cry. To me - crying releases something inside that makes me feel better - makes my burden lighter. I take deep breaths .. not good enough. I pray, I pray out of the honesty of my heart and get no relief. I'm getting up early tomorrow morning, reading the Word, going in an hour early to be alone at work, listening to some praise music and ignoring all distractions. Heck, I am going to take a lunch break for once. AMAZING! Here's my issue - We usually have at least 4 people in my department. We now are working with 2. It's very hard to do your job to the fullest when you're short staffed. I've got a possible meeting set up with the VP of HR tomorrow and I hope my list gets it through their heads that we need help and it must be immediate.
If you're a praying person reading this, please pray for peace which passes all understanding. Keep my baby healthy, help me to remember to breathe most importantly.

A change of heart

You know what? Today was awesome. It was busy but it wasn't stressful, for once. And thank you LORD for taking care of me today! I am about to hop on the couch, or in bed so I can concentrate, and read my Christian marriage book. I tell you what, reading those books really makes a difference in our marriage - even though Todd doesn't know I read it (I don't think he notices what books I read). I read, I pray and I swear everything just changes in our marriage. It's really awesome to say the least!

I worked out today, which probably made the difference. I TOOK A BREAK! I rode 3 miles on the bike and walked hard on the treadmill for 15 minutes. It felt good, my back loosened up a little bit and I bet my heart and baby enjoyed the extra blood flow. Felt good!

Bummed..

Sometimes I feel like certain people are not in my life for a reason. I try my best to be in their lives and I don't get it why they don't care. Like, I truly feel like they don't care and it hurts. Since I've known this person for YEARS (2nd grade) and they blow me off .. Should I even try to be n their life anymore? I have always been the friend that was around if they needed someone but I was never around because they wanted me there. So, I feel like if I quit caring, they won't notice anyways.. I don't know if that makes any sense. Maybe it does? I guess it just hurts being 'on the hook' when that person should realize that I am here for them. And I guess it's all a part of growing up and just facing the fact that I am now who that person wants or needs in their life. I suppose that's not a bad thing, I guess I was just hoping that person would care about me and be my friend... Any advice would be great. I am just a little upset and want to know what your feelings are about it and if something similar has happened and how you 'got over it.'

=)

I'd just like to say that even though some things in my life are poopy, I had a great day and a great night with my family. My kid cracks me up all the time and I just can't believe how smart he is. I love him more than life itself and am proud to be his mommy.

OOOOH Sundays..

How I love them but hate to see them go by at the end of the night. I'm really hoping i'll be able to stay at home with Owen after he's born. It's hard waking up every day and going to work. It pretty much sucks. I love what I get to do (I hate the data entry part of my job, but I like knowing people are getting proper training on their weapons), but I cannot stand my boss. He's a frickin' northerner (I pretty much dislike all northerner's) with a personality problem - ie, he doesn't have a personality. So, he's supposedly this awesome "Sales" guy, but without a personality, sorry president, I don't buy it. Oh yes, that's right! He's your cousin!! He must be perfect for the job then! DOH! I just don't see how someone with zero military/LE experience is a VP over anything at this company.. It just irritates me to no end. I'm the only one in the department that hasn't gotten written up this year yet. The only time I've ever been written up was last year because I READ AN EMAIL.. Long story. Anyway. I'd really, REALLY like it if I didn't have to work after the baby is here. I am going to milk it for all it's worth and take off 12 weeks if my plan of not working falls through. 3 months - man, it's going to be hard going back to work after that so my man needs to figure out what he's going to do. =)
Today was a beautiful day out - cold. 48 was the high. Not a cloud in the sky right now. We seldom get those days in the winter up here so when we do, we LOVE it. Working on the shower to get it re-tiled and then this bad boy of a house is going on the market. We're moving to FL this year.. NO MATTER WHAT! Moving here really helped our marriage, but we hate it here. There's nothing but cold/harsh winters and the summers aren't so great - not being able to swim in the gulf, besides while we were in Pcola this summer, REALLY SUCKS! The Atlantic is so cold. It is like having ice cubes in the water.. We're ready for Florida and we can't get there fast enough! So, pray for us and the selling of our home. Our hearts are desiring for peace in FL and we'd like to sell this place and move as soon as possible! Happy Sunday! Tomorrow is March 1st already! Two weeks later, the time changes and before you know it - spring will be here!

22 weeks, a little early

So,
This is my 22nd week blog. I'm a few days early but I forget to post sometimes. Still at 149 pounds, which is amazing considering how my belly has just popped out the past week. My uterus is growing still and it's growing a little above my belly button now. Sad to say, but it's starting to pop out =( I hated that with Ayden and I'll hate it again with Owen. Oh well. Anywho, the boy kicks all the time. I went in for another appointment yesterday and he tried to listen to the heartbeat. He found it and the baby moved away from it.. he said he heard it and said 'there's no use today, he's moving too much.' ha! I KNOW! He moves all the time. Well, my back hurts constantly.. probably time to invest in a full body pillow this weekend and get more comfy in bed and get something to help my back while I'm at my desk all day at work. Ayden is always hugging my belly and kissing it. He asks me to pull up my shirt so he can kiss little Owen. He's going to be such a big helper and a great big brother.
Todd is being sweet to me.. he's always asking how I feel and asks how 'we' are doing =) He's getting the house ready to put on the market. We have to retile the shower and possibly the bathroom floor and then it's going online. No more waiting around.. it's time to get back down to Florida.
It's about time for another meal.. I have stawberries waiting on me next. MMM! Have a super weekend!

21 week picture update .. only 19 more to go!

Just posting two preggo pictures for my 21 week post!

5 month update

Well, I did post that we are having a little boy. His name is going to be Owen and we just cannot wait to see him. It's hard going to sleep knowing this precious little man is going to be in our lives in just a few more months. I don't want to rush it because this pregnancy has been great, but I can't wait to see him!

I only gained 2 pounds since my last visit, right on target. I'm at 149 pounds and it's still all in my belly. I'm horrible at taking pictures of myself but will take some and upload this week.. I hope!

The first picture is his profile and the second one.. well, I guess he's trying to cover it up! It was hilarious seeing that he was covering it almost the whole time. We'll see if he does that in real life once he gets older =)

He moves all the time and appears to be 100% healthy. Thank you, Lord! I registered at Babies R Us in case you want to check out what I'd like.. also, Target.com ... Shower will be April 3rd in Florida!

Its .. A ...

BOY OH BOY! Little Owen Schrader =)

I'll put the ultra sound pics up as soon as I scan them. yay!!!

ONE MORE HOUR!!!!!!!!!

...Until I find out what we're having. Yes, I will update today but I am just so excited. YAYAYAYAY!!!!

Week 20 - 5 months!

So, I am posting a little early. Monday is the actual 20th week but I was just excited... and i have a little time today to post.

Everything is going well. The baby moves a lot and it's crazy, but it moves at the same time every day. Hmm? Is someone already on a sleep schedule? I don't know if that happens invitro, but it's cool at least. I will take some pictures tomorrow, on Valentine's Day, and will post them.

I spent half of my day uploaded and resizing all of our weddings pictures from 2007. I don't know what I'll do with them yet, but I want to do something nice for Todd for our anniversary. It's March 24th so I have a bit of time still. I think just making the photo album will be nice. Of course, I am going to make him a cake and dinner and drink some non-alcoholic bubbly! Time has flown - 3 years already! This man is so good to me and Ayden. It makes this pregnancy fly by .. it's so easy. He's so sweet to me and caring. He's such a great husband and daddy!

Anyway. Friday the 19th we find out what we're having!! My mom and step-dad are coming to town and I can't wait to share the news with everyone. Friday is going to be so much fun!

Hope you're having a good weekend. Have a great Valentine's Day!

19 Week Update!

Well, The baby is moving all the time - it's moving right now. I can't wait to find out what we're having. I have two more Fridays to go until we get the first ultra sound. Yay! My mom and step-dad are coming that weekend to spend some time with Ayden. It's going to be cold, I'm sure, but they're excited to be here. I haven't seen them since Ayden's birthday last August.

We're going to be celebrating our 3rd anniversary March 24th and I can honestly say I love Todd more today than I did when we were married. He's the best thing that ever happend to me and I just love him to death. (My kids are also the best thing, but you know what I mean.)

We're going to watch the superbowl here tonight and make some cheese sticks, wish me luck, and chicken wings. And then we'll eat the delicious cookies I made and follow it down with the YUMMY vanilla bean ice cream =)

My heart is hurting for her

(I hope you don't mind me posting)
My friend, I've known her since 2nd grade, was pregnant .. She was due just 2 weeks after me. My dear, sweet, God-fearing friend lost her little one recently and I am speachless. My heart hurts. My tears are flowing. I can only give her the reassurance of my prayers and that's all I can do for her. I wish I was there with her, to hug her and love on her and to tell her that God has her in his hands. This will be used to bless others. This is an amazing gift that wasn't brought into this world for some reason. God has it in control. I have no doubt, not a shadow of a doubt that His good and perfect timing is taking over and the God who is in charge will restore her faith. She will be renewed. She will use this for the glory of God and will be able to share her stories, her words, her writing.. She will be used and she will know that she is fearfully and wonderfully made. Her body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and nothing will defeat her. She is an amazing Proverbs 31 wife and all who know her, know she is being blessed in ways she cannot even imagine. The Lord is pleased with you, friend. He loves you. He cares for you. He has blessed you and will continue to bless you.
I haven't experienced a miscarriage but I can only imagine how painful these 3 have been on you an I love you more than you know girl. You are an inspiration to me and all who know you. You are blessed. YOU ARE BLESSED.
I am praying for peace which passes all understanding. I Corinthians 13 .. Love you Critt.

18 week update

18 weeks and feeling great! I was afraid I wouldn't feel well today without the morning sickness medicine but so far, so good. I have another bottle of medicine but I think I'll be okay without it. Hoping at least!
A few more weeks and I'll know what we're having! I go on the 19th of February and cannot wait to find out! It's so exciting! I feel it move all the time now and just want to know what it is. If it's a boy, he'll be Owen Scott Schrader. If it's a girl, Sarah (middle name?) Schrader.
April 5-9 is spring break so we're going to FL .
Nothing too new on the home front.. just playing in the snow and getting ready to start the week all over again. Hope your weekend went well and have a great week!

Week 17!

I'm starting on week 17 and I've gained 6 pounds this last 4 weeks. HA! So, I'm now at 147lbs and have to say, most of it is in my belly and my hooha's haha.. They have grown and I found the most comfortable bra in the world, surprisingly it is a nursing bra. It's magnificant!

Not too much going on in our world except the trio of Schrader's/Kennedy is doing really well and we're all living harmoniously. It's good stuff!

We watched the Curious Case of Bejamin Button - very long, very sad, but very good! I cried a few times and it was a tad depressing, but man, it was such a good story and great plot. Thanks Netflix!

Next appointment is February 19th.. I think I'll be 22 weeks at that time (I don't feel like counting right now) but that is the BIG day! I'll be updating, but that'll be the best post ever!

Happy last week of January folks!

16 weeeks - 4 months baby!

I am 16 weeks pregnant.. well, tomorrow I will be so I'm a little early. I'm so excited to have my appointment on Friday. Even though I won't have a u/s until week 20, it's always exciting to hear the heart beat.

Hoping things goes well at my job.. Last night I was really stressed and felt like I was already having braxton hicks. Not sure if that's what happened but that's what I am thinking.

Hopefully I am done taking my phenagren. I didn't take it last night and I felt fine this morning. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

5 months and I get to hold little baby #2!

I'm just pooped

I know every job has it's hoochies that try to take your man. I know every job you'll end up hating one person. I know every job will stress you out every now and then, but do I really need to be stressed?
I won't be there this winter, if all goes according to plan, so I'm busting my tail for what? Job security? I haven't taken a lunch break in 1.5 weeks and I am just getting tired. Along with working 9+ hours a day, I come home and have to 'deal' with home life. Sad that I just 'deal' with it right now but I am just tired and stressed...

15 weeks and counting.. I can't wait for my 5 month appt to HOPEFULLY get an ultrasound. If only I could be that lucky.

...gotta get happy and de-stress.

Sustain Me!

Wow, I was reading a verse from today's little e-mail devotional and it struck a cord and man, I am happy!

Isaiah 46:4, "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." (NIV)

When I am down and sad, all I do is think about the little things that make me upset and I get even more sad. But why? I have a loving God who will sustain and rescue me! Do you know what this means!?! It's more than an amazing thing.. it's LIFE! Even when I am old, the Lord will be next to me and will take me safely to the next day.

It's like that amount of food I need to get me going in the morning so I don't pass out.. it's like the gas in my truck to take me places.. He should be first in our lives because He's the only one who can carry us where we belong.

I'm praying for a long, healthy life and you know what? I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength!

BTW, I received my 5 books and have started reading one by Dave Ramsey.. it's amazing how someone can write a book to help millions and put verses here or there. Picking that book out, I didn't know he was a Christian but I'm sure he's helped a ton of people save their financial lives and bring some to the Lord. I'm praying for financial peace.. BRING IT ON, LORD!

Have a BLESSED and joyous Wednesday!

14 weeks, baby

I am feeling really good today! Felt great yesterday too. Unfortunately, my back hurts pretty bad. I read it's because my hips are starting to spread a little, but come on! Give me a break! I have to sit in an uncomfortable chair all day and stare at a computer. No relief I tell ya, no relief.

So, nothing new here.. Just thought I'd stop by and post a little bit. Hopefully you're having a good week! It's cold up here.. brrr!!!